I woke up this morning with those deep breaths of anxiety.
Trying to mutter my first words of morning,
“I rise before dawn and cry for help. My Hope comes from Your Word.”
Those are the words I cling to and have clung to ever since Nick died…….My Hope comes from Your Word…
It’s true.
Without His Word, I don’t know where I’d be.
His Word fills me.
His Word strengthens me.
His Word sustains me.
His Word comforts me.
His Word corrects me.
His Word challenges me.
His Word breathes into me.
His Word breathes out of me.
His Word reminds me……
It reminds me that
I’m His.
I’m forgiven.
I’m loved.
I’m redeemed.
I’m safe.
I’m covered.
I’m never alone.
I’m surrounded.
Yes, I put my trust in His Word daily.
So, why do I wake up with deep breaths?
Why do I wake up thinking that I can’t do everything that is waiting for me today?
An all day teacher’s meeting followed by an after-school meeting followed by Open House……then getting ready for tomorrow night’s women’s retreat…..and Erich and Mallory coming to visit this weekend and one of my dearest friend’s daughter’s wedding this weekend….an hour and a half away….and 5K details that have to be taken care of……and Olivia’s ball games and 8th grade night………and Evan waiting to hear about a job interview in California….and..and..and….
Then I remember His Word.
I remember a verse I memorized while Nick was facing cancer and almost monthly MRIs.
When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.
In God, whose word I praise-
in God I trust and am not afraid.
What can mere mortals do to me?
Psalm 56: 3-4
And I smile.
I smile because I know that there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING on this planet that can separate me from God’s love.
There is NOTHING that can hurt me.
I just have to check things off the best I can and trust in Him.
Trust in Him.
Trust in Him.
Trust in Him.
That’s what I’m doing this morning as I want to type more but Olivia is needing help in the kitchen…
I’m going to help her just like God longs to help me and you.
Because she called for me, I go.
When we cry out to God, He comes…
and He is all we need.
In December of 2007 as our youngest son, Nick, was fighting brain cancer, I began to blog. Writing provided a way for me to release all of my questions, fears, and doubts. It also allowed me to share the ups and downs of Nick's journey with people who were praying for him all over the world. When Nick went Home in November of 2008, my blog became my way of searching for God in the midst of my deep heartache. My heart was broken and grief brought to the surface every emotion imaginable. Being able to release those emotions through my writing brought a sense of purpose to my pain. Having already walked the road of grief in 1992 when we lost our daughter to SIDS, I knew I needed a way to keep from falling into a pit of depression and despair. I had walked close to the edge of a bottomless pit when we lost our daughter,and I knew I couldn't let myself get that close to the edge again. This blog has been and continues to be my tiny corner of the world where I can share My Heart as I journey through God's Word.......thus the name........ My Heart His Words. Thank you for taking time to share life with me. If we do not meet while here on earth, I look forward to hearing all about your life when we reach our final destiny.........Heaven! Email me anytime at 
Dear Tammy
No wonder you wake up feeling stressed with a day like that to look forward to. May I just give you a bit of wisdom i have learned over the years. That is learn to say “No”.
It is just as valid an answer as yes. Although lots of things are good they are not all right for us. Sometimes we do get a really busy spell but if it becomes habitual we need to do something about it.
I pray things calm down soon and thank God that he gives us strength for the day even if the rushing is our fault.
Jen,
YOu are sooooooooo right!!!!
I have decided to say “no” to everything in November and December. Olivia’s basketball season will be over, and we are going to rest and enjoy our holiday evenings baking and cuddling!
I had said “yes” to several things before school began, so I need to complete those commitments. 🙂 Pray that I can be okay with this decision. “No” has always been a difficult word for me.
I love you, and I appreciate your honesty! You have become like a second mom to me in Australia, and I cherish your emails and posts so very much. I especially love to watch the video you made of the ocean waves because I can hear your sweet Australian accent as you speak over the sound of the ocean tide coming in and out.
Thankful for you!
Tammy