Donna, Barbara, my mom, me, Donnette, and Brenda
About three months ago, I received an email asking if I could come speak at a church’s Christmas Luncheon on December 6th. At the time, everything was so uncertain with Nick’s health, so I told them “Yes,” with the understanding that I may have to back out at the last minute.
They were very understanding, and I was very thankful.
Well, time went by and as December 6th approached, I knew that Nick’s health was going to make the engagement a difficult one to keep.
Unfortunately, as you all know, Nick ended his battle with cancer on Saturday, November 29th, at around 10:50 in the morning.
Suddenly, time literally stopped for our family.
Each day since Nick’s entrance into Heaven, our family has struggled to find a new kind of normal here at our home.
One of the first big decisions I had to make was whether or not to keep my speaking engagement.
I decided that Nick would be very disappointed if I didn’t go, and I also felt it was a great way to be with mom when she reentered her friendship circle as the church was in the town just next to her home.
So, two friends of mine and I headed out on Saturday at 7:15 in the morning with my mom and drove straight to Ekron Baptist Church in Ekron, KY. The program began at 11. When we arrived, I was overwhelmed with the beauty of the decorations throughout the banquet room. Low-lighting, candles, and Christmas lights surrounded us as we walked through the door.
I have to admit that part of my heart was saying, “Why didn’t I just say I couldn’t make it?”
Each table was decorated beautifully by a different lady….
the creativity was unreal! We were so inspired to take this idea back to our home church.
We enjoyed a wonderful meal, listened to some great Christmas music, and then it was my turn to take the stage.
Honestly, I felt sick inside. But, I also felt determined to share hope with the nearly 150 women in the audience.
The topic they had asked me to speak on in September was, “There’s Always a Bright Side.”
Having lost Nick since agreeing to this topic, I had to do some deep soul-searching to share truth on this day.
Is there a bright side to losing a child? Does every cloud have a silver lining?
These are tough questions, but questions that scream for answers.
I shared from my heart, and I shared from God’s Word……………..that yes, there is a bright side to everything we face in this world. Finding the bright side often takes time….lots of time……….but in time it will come.
After I spoke, I was amazed at how many women came to me crying who had also lost a child or even more than one child in their lifetime. We hugged, talked, and just shared time together.
I walked away from this very special event knowing deep in my heart that although Nick’s life here on this planet may have been brought to an early end, Nick’s life story is only beginning. God is going to use Nick for years to come to bring comfort, hope, strength, and peace to hurting families.
While I am sad and broken-hearted in a physical sense, I am energized and excited in a spiritual sense.
When I can keep my focus on the eternal, I see so clearly that God has a plan and purpose for Nick’s life that I must carry out……and for Adrienne’s life.
The Nicholas Yancy Nischan Foundation is in the process of becoming incorporated. Under this foundation’s umbrella, seven ministries will be served as Nick was seven when he first became sick. One of these ministries will be outreach to grieving families who have lost a child. I will share more about the other ministries after our first board meeting in January.
Thank you for continuing to pray for our family. Please pray for this foundation as well.
In December of 2007 as our youngest son, Nick, was fighting brain cancer, I began to blog. Writing provided a way for me to release all of my questions, fears, and doubts. It also allowed me to share the ups and downs of Nick's journey with people who were praying for him all over the world. When Nick went Home in November of 2008, my blog became my way of searching for God in the midst of my deep heartache. My heart was broken and grief brought to the surface every emotion imaginable. Being able to release those emotions through my writing brought a sense of purpose to my pain. Having already walked the road of grief in 1992 when we lost our daughter to SIDS, I knew I needed a way to keep from falling into a pit of depression and despair. I had walked close to the edge of a bottomless pit when we lost our daughter,and I knew I couldn't let myself get that close to the edge again. This blog has been and continues to be my tiny corner of the world where I can share My Heart as I journey through God's Word.......thus the name........ My Heart His Words. Thank you for taking time to share life with me. If we do not meet while here on earth, I look forward to hearing all about your life when we reach our final destiny.........Heaven! Email me anytime at 
Hello friend…what a wonderful testament to your faith and Nick’s life. I so wish I could have heard you speak. I am so looking forward to hearing about your foundation!! I never cease to be amazed at all the hurting, grieving moms and dads I meet…there are so many.
Sending you a hug today (oh, did you by chance see the video that I mentioned on my blog. It was a blessing.) Love ya much –
jennifer
Tammy,
You are the BRIGHT SIDE!!! I am so glad you went to Ekron. I would have loved to see all those decorations you describe. You are such a wonderful woman.
xoxo
YOU are such a brave, obedient woman of God! Most people in your situation would at least for a time crawl under the covers and hide. Thank you for your example of following our Lords leading.
I can “see” God with his arm around Nick’s shoulders just smiling down on you.
blessings,
Kim
I know there are rough days and that’s OK… I believe though that God is pleased because you are continuing to lean on and rely on and trust only in HIM to get you through each day… each moment. God is honored in everything you say and do. Keep holding onto His Hand.
Continuing to lift you up with much love & prayer,
Bonnelle
See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland. Isa. 43:19
My sweet Tammy,
Once again I ATTEMPT to stop by to check up on you and leave a word of encouragement, and here I sit blessed beyond words.
This post touched me so deeply. I know it was only God’s amazing GRACE that you went and stood up and shared.
I cried to think of the impact on so many women’s lives, and the beginning of the new song God is giving you.
Thanks once again for faithfully sharing the goodness of our God.
Love you Tammy♥
PS I’m putting something in the mail for you today, be on the look out!
Praying hard for each and every family member today
What a wonderful tribute to Nick that you were able to do this. I know Christ touched many lives that day through you. I look forward to knowing more about the foundations set up in Nick’s honor. Thank you for being such an inspiration to me.
Everyday I come to your blog to read the words you have written. You never cease to amaze me how God is working in your life, even through the most difficult times! I read your words to seek comfort as well as encouragement. It is hard at times to see that “bright side”. Thank you for doing what you do and being who you are!! You are one special lady Tammy! Love you!
Praise God that you are comforting those with the comfort you yourself have received from God. I am so sorry for your loss. I pray that God continue to keep your eyes on the eternal. Thanks for sharing your heart and story.
JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW THAT YOU, TIM, AND YOUR OTHER PRECIOUS CHILDREN CONTINUE TO BE IN MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS. I KNOW YOUR TALK WAS AWESOME. WISH I COULD HAVE BEEN THERE TO HEAR IT. YOU CONTINUE TO AMAZE ME.SENDING YOU LOVE, PRAYERS, AND HUGS.
Tammy,
I am a new reader to your blog and wanted to offer some more encouragement as you continue to walk this journey – of giving God all the glory through the loss of Nick. Which is but a moment and we will be joined together with him and all of our precious children in heaven one day very soon. Oh the glory of the LORD and His love for all of us. That He knows the perfect moment to bring us all home. I am touched by your story and hope. Let that hope and your beautiful faith carry you as others will need to be touched by all that God has asked you to walk through. He has gone before you and the path is straight – one step at a time, one day at a time, walk and He will guide you!
Blessings to you and your family. You are in our prayers!
Jill
indeed, nick’s life work will go on forever. so many will come to know Jesus because of him. bless your heart for being willing to go and share that day. you amaze me.
love to you, my friend!!
~sheryl
This is so encouraging. I can see the Hand of God working on you and in you as you attended this luncheon. He sure did sooth your soul at an event you didn’t know if you should attend/speak.
Praise the Lord for His bountiful blessings, Amen?
Love and prayers,
Paula
Just passing through via Forever His. Your strength and encouragement are exemplary. Bless you.
e-Mom @ Chrysalis
Hi Tammy,
I came over from Susan’s blog. I am very touched by your post tonight. Thanks so much for sharing. I am so sorry for your loss. Praise God for him giving you the strength to go ahead with your speaking engagement. It sounds like you touched more people than you ever imaagined. Bless you and your precious family.
What a gift you were in this time of grieving. Your courage and willingness to share touches my heart. I wish I could’ve heard it. Nick’s story is just beginning to be told through you! March on, my fellow soldier. May you comfort others with the comfort you have received.
Hugs from Colorado Springs,
Tiffany