I hit a wall about the fourth day of our trip. An emotional wall. I had seen so many disturbing things. I was tired. My whole body ached from the train ride, and I had a little meltdown in our room. Truthfully, I was ready to come home.
It’s weird when you’re up against such a looming wall. I knew that there was no possible way to run from where I was……an 12-hour train ride and a 14-hour plane ride just to get back to America……getting “out” of where I found myself was not possible. So, I had to make a choice. A choice to be miserable or a choice to embrace where I was.
It was amazing how God knew just what I needed when the devil had tried so hard to pull me down. I had looked at Tim on this particular morning after he had said, “How are you doin, baby?” And my reply was very sadly, “I want to go home.”
It was just within three hours of saying this that we were taken to a village women’s meeting where we had the opportunity to spend an hour or so with a group of women who live day in and day out with very little. Foot-pedal sewing machines, bare walls, dirt roads, no vehicles, no luxuries………
And it was in this hour that I was revived. I saw happy women. Thankful women. Smiling women. Women who loved Jesus…..no matter what. Ladies who were not quitters.
When we were introduced and the story of Nick’s death was told to them, tears began to fall down my face and one Indian woman touched my arm and said, “No cry….no cry….,” as she continued to smile at me and rub my arm. I smiled back through my tears.
As we pulled away from the home where the women had been meeting, I waved out the window looking so many women right in the eye as they lined the street waving and smiling. In their eyes I saw the love of Jesus.
I saw genuine faith in action.
I saw hope for India.
I saw new friends we will all share Heaven with.
I saw God saying, “Tammy, you can make it through this trip….”
And from that moment on, I was reenergized.
Thank you, Lord, for allowing satan to sift me like wheat….but for being there to help my faith from failing.
Now, my prayer is that I can strengthen others who are trying to walk close to you,